Hello fellow techies👋
This week, I got to chat with April Ayres, a Senior Software Engineer at HashiCorp (now a Platform Engineer at InDebted) whose career started literally debugging systems in COBOL. She’s been writing code for 25 years… And figuring herself out for just as long.
What makes April’s story special? She’s deeply introspective, honest, and navigating the tech world as someone who’s autistic and has ADHD. Her insights are real, relatable, and so needed in this industry.
Here’s what stuck with me 👇
🧠 Learning to Code Without a Map
April’s journey into software was initially self-taught and experimental. We’re talking:
Reverse-engineering Assembly from game listings as a kid
Building and experimenting on computers such as Commodore 64 and Vic 20 because why not
Eventually getting a formal CS degree to fill in the “why” behind the “what”
“I'd ended up kind of just prototyping, build rough things, refine them and stuff like that, and kind of come at things from a very low level and then build up from there ”
It’s a reminder that unconventional paths can lead to incredibly deep expertise.
🌀 ADHD, Autism & Burnout
April was diagnosed with ADHD in 2021 and autism in 2022. Suddenly, years of experience made sense—especially the pattern of overperforming, crashing, then wondering what went wrong.
“ I was always like the hard task master on myself, and I, I realized I'd never really given myself that grace that I gave to other people”
We talked about:
The dopamine chase – Loving the hard problems, avoiding the boring ones
Masking – Trying to “act normal” 24/7 until you mentally shut down
Rejection Sensitivity – Obsessing over how something might land... even if it’s ‘perfect’
She also dropped this gem:
“ I always make the analogy between eating cake and eating your vegetables, it's very easy to kind of just go for the shiny, and then once you solve that problem, it's like your brain's like, oh, that's done now, that's boring now I understand it. ”
Same.
🧱 What an Inclusive Team Actually Looks Like
One of the best parts of this episode? April describing what good support feels like.
At a previous company, her manager opened with:
“ I understand you're autistic. I would love to know how I can make things work better for you?”
That set the tone for openness and trust from day one.
We also talked about:
How even things like “just come to lunch with us” can feel awkward unless you’re invited
Why it’s so important to make vulnerability safe—not performative
The power of being honest about energy levels and shifting meetings when you’re overstimulated
🔁 Dealing with Change (IBM Acquisition Feels)
We touched on the HashiCorp–IBM acquisition too. April described the emotional fog of sudden, large-scale change: uncertainty, fear of culture loss, and lack of clarity.
Her strategy? Focus on what you can control.
“If there's one thing you can do to kind of take control of the situation, do that one thing and, and try not to worry about that.”
Sometimes, just doing the next thing is enough.
🎯 Takeaways for Engineers (Especially the Neurodivergent Ones)
✅ Break work into small wins. Your brain loves momentum.
✅ Flex your self-advocacy muscle. No one knows what you need unless you tell them.
✅ If you feel dread every Sunday night... that’s your sign.
✅ Be the person who invites others in. You never know who’s waiting for permission to belong.
✅ Your struggles don’t make you “less” of an engineer. They often make you better.
🎧 Listen to this episode if you…
Ever felt guilty for not finishing projects
Have ADHD or autism—or think you might
Want to build teams that actually include neurodiverse folks
Are stuck in a job that drains you but afraid to jump
Feel like your wiring makes tech harder than it needs to be
🔗 Connect with April on LinkedIn to learn more about her journey!
💬 What’s something you’ve been masking at work lately?
Let me know in the comments—or just hit reply. Your story might help someone else feel seen.
Until next time,
Jade 🖤
Host, Tech Unfiltered
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